The other day, I was sharing a banter with my mum and thought about writing a blog post to share with everyone what living in a typical African home is and most especially what it feels like to have an African mother in my case a Yoruba mother. Some days after, I was on Instagram and I saw someone share a post about an earring and what her African mother and mother in law will think about the earring in the caption and it was so apt and similar to what mine would say. So I figured this post was a must write for me so Africans who wants to relish memories can and also Non-Africans who wants to know what it feels like to live with/ have an African mother.
EVERYTHING IS USUALLY LINKED TO THE SPIRITUAL.
There is hardly anything that isn’t translated to the spiritual by my mum. I can remember vividly the superheroes like Spiderman, Batman and the rest were demonic to my mum. And if you are wondering why I don’t like teddy bears like most girls, it is thanks to my mum; she claimed evil spirits can possess the dolls so it is a NO in her home.
An African mothers grocery list is always similar to her last. There are some things that must always be on her grocery list every month even it is in excess already. For my mum, in every grocery list, she must include Bath tissue, Potatoes, Bathing Soap, Toothpaste and Vegetable oil (her favorite). It is a MUST because she claims having these items in excess won’t hurt anyone and isn’t a bad idea.
African mothers are conceitedly assertive and dogmatic in their opinions. And they will always want you to go by their opinions a 100%. There is this proverb in Yoruba that “What an elder sees while sitting, the young cannot see it even if they climb the tallest tree” they always use it to support their point.
African mothers from the size 14 upwards are always trying to lose weight. My mum has been on her weight loss journey since I was old enough to know her as my mother. She taught me my first set of aerobics/exercise. But she still hasn’t lost so much weight to me because she is still a loyal buyer of size 16/18 clothes.
LIFE OF THE PARTY.
They are the life of the party. They are most effective if it is their friends’ party or so. They will be the first to get there to ensure all preparations are in top gear and will be the last to leave the venue of the party. Need I say they also buy or make souvenirs for these parties. And they know the latest songs released by popular artiste thanks to the information gotten from their children.
REPEATING THE SAME WORDS.
I recently realized that the older my mum is getting she would just always want you to repeat the same words over and over again even if you just said it some minutes ago to be double sure. The other day, she was watching a video of Kiss Daniel perform and I said that’s Kiss Daniel performing, some minutes later she said who is this performing and I answered her, then some minutes after that she said ehn, who sang this song? At this point, I am like Mummy!!!
QUEEN OF RANTS.
The typical Sanguine/Choleric African mother rants (it’s in few cases they aren’t sanguine/choleric). They rant about anything and everything, don’t just mess with them. So today, my mum thought she misplaced her purse and started looking for it; me being the one who saw the purse with her last started searching everywhere, but my brother sat down and kept asking logical questions, she became furious because my brother didn’t get up and she just started ranting, we later found the purse in the car. By the way, I am used to her rants now but I try as much as possible to avoid it.
African mothers protect their children (biological, foster and spiritual) like the mother hen and go all the way for them. They don’t care whatever it takes, so far their children’s happiness is involved, they will do it. I remember when I was in high school and I wanted to travel to the UK for summer, she didn’t have the money at hand but she knew I wanted to go, so she went out of her way to get the money, I later realized it wasn’t worth it and that money will be needed as a freshman in the University.
Going back memory lane, I remember how my mum used to beat/slap me silly. At some point, I started thinking she wasn’t my mother because she just didn’t spare the rod. but guess what? I am better off today because of her beatings and I am super grateful to her for beating sense into me but then it felt too much. Let me add that age slows them down a whole lot also.
My African mum never wants to be regarded as a woman who doesn’t know what’s trending at any point in time. From the news to politics to fashion and the list is endless. She will ask whats trending from me and my brother and also search for it on the internet. That’s why we have the same set of clothes in different sizes and we work out together. She recently just joined Instagram and she has been disturbing the whole house.
You just got to love an African mum. They just make life a lot more interesting and fun. I love my African mum just the way she is and wouldn’t have it any other way.
***N.B: This post was 100% written based on my relationship with my SanChlor (Sanguine and Choleric temperament) mother who belongs to the Yoruba tribe in Nigeria. It is in no way a form of discrimination against any other tribe in Africa or race in general.
Does your African mum do any of these things? And what are the other things I didn’t talk about? I will be in the comment section.